Ever Been Cheated On?
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Zz.ee.vV replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 5:32pm |
 Coolness: 194015 | never cheated on a girl *I* considered a girlfriend. been cheated on. its cool tho, thickens your skin and makes you re-evaluate the black and white view on this most of us seem to have at earlier points of adult life.
heres an interesting question to ponder: whats better - a partner who REALLY loves you, cares for you, is great in all respects (looks, personality etc) and one day when youre having a tough time or something - slips, cheats, comes back and honestly confesses everything, reaffirms his/her love and is sorry as hell; OR, a partner who is all right but has some aspects you dont quite like, says he/she loves you but it often feels like the passion is not quite there, annoys and/or bores you a bit, BUT are loyal as hell and you know for sure wont cheat, telling yourself it is because the person is just stable like that but really wondering if it's because they are afraid of losing you and dont know if they can do any better. would you keep the first? would you be happy with the second? my answers to those questions would probably be different five years ago... but right now i'll take the first over the second anyday. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» blah123 replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 5:59pm |
 Coolness: 46860 | tough question. I think i would choose the first. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» nothingnopenope replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 6:23pm |
 Coolness: 201215 | I'd rather the first but without the cheating |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» elka replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 6:34pm |
| Coolness: 52420 | id take the first for sure. Id rather deal with hardships with someone i love, than be treated amazingly by someone i have mediocre feelings for. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Zz.ee.vV replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 6:37pm |
| Coolness: 194015 | Originally posted by SCOTTYP...
I'd rather the first but without the cheating right. or the second one without the crappy aspects which ultimately comes up to the same thing. unfortunately, avoiding the question will not change reality. i didnt exemplify this particular scenario above with no reason. those of you with experience know, that it is very often exactly what happens. people with more to offer (passion, vibrant personality, looks etc.) have more choice. with choice comes temptation. when you cant do much in that direction anyway (at least not without alot of effort), you don't even need to resist anything because temptation is not there, and when it is, you will think long and hard before you risk what you have. if on the other hand you feel that you keep on giving and are being mistreated, and opportunities are all there, it takes that much more willpower not to slip. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» nothingnopenope replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 6:41pm |
| Coolness: 201215 | yeah I understand I am constantly tempting other people |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Zz.ee.vV replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 6:43pm |
| Coolness: 194015 | Originally posted by SCOTTYP...
yeah I understand I am constantly tempting other people you sure hit the nail on its head dude, stopping myself from giving you hot love was one of the hardest things i had to do  |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» nothingnopenope replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 6:45pm |
| Coolness: 201215 | that's okay you could always call neoform |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Zz.ee.vV replied on Mon May 9, 2005 @ 6:50pm |
| Coolness: 194015 | Originally posted by ELKA...
id take the first for sure. Id rather deal with hardships with someone i love, than be treated amazingly by someone i have mediocre feelings for. exactly.. i think people who choose the opposite are often basing it (often subconsciously) on internal self esteem issues, and needing to be reaffirmed by someone... of course there are other reasons but thats probably the biggest and most common one. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» moondancer replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 4:04am |
 Coolness: 92255 | Originally posted by REGIMENTAL911...
It's impossible to have a healthy relationship now a day's . im gonna say the last healthyrelationship was back in the jesus day's .where you can actually focus on your mate without technological interuptions,and a better moral standard. WQe're fucked ,we will never ever experience a relationship as it should be.The world is simply too fucked. What makes you think they had a better moral standard? We have more far-reachign news reports yes, less criminals, no. There is less torture and war goign on now then ever, i believe. Far less murders. There has always been something to distract people, it`s all relative. If it wasn`t farmign it was hunting or pottery or books. The only thing that`s changed is that it is now socially acceptable to get divorced and have sex before marriage. The world is not more fucked. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» moondancer replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 4:09am |
| Coolness: 92255 | people always cheated on eachother |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» elka replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 10:34am |
| Coolness: 52420 | Originally posted by MOONDANCER...
people always cheated on eachother so true. it was way worse back in the day, women would be stoned to death for looking at another guy.. And it would be acceptable for men to have many mistresses. people are sluts lol |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Mr_Frog replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 12:01pm |
 Coolness: 97090 | it's almost still like that in some countries! |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Nie replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 1:46pm |
| Coolness: 50640 | Ze'ev, I would back out. Of both. Loving someone you know has let you down when you needed him/her the most. Not only to let you down but to completly forget about you for 1 night. To go that far and not think about you...or say to him/herself: ''Right now, I don't care!''
I couldn't put up with it I'm sorry. As per having someone at your feet, no thank you. I already have myself to take care of and its plenty! I have a hard time understanding how people forgive that someone they love cheated on them...how do you not thik about it all the time? Or should I say from time to time. And there's the whole issue of trusting. You might never find out but you bf/gf is a real slut and is cheating left and right with people you don't even know he/she talks to. What if your bf/gf does something suspicious...very suspicious, what do you do? Torture yourself? Trust him/her? Back off? I think I'ld back off. Life is enough complicated as it is, no time for that bullshit! |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Zz.ee.vV replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 8:00pm |
| Coolness: 194015 | Give it time Nie. I used to think the exact same way. As years pass and you get more experience you realize some issues aren;'t black and white, and this is the epithome of such. That's really all I'm going to say because no amount of arguments or proof can substitute for that simple understanding. That aside, I also think your first paragraph is unduly harsh and is not necessarily true, especially in the case I've described. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cinderella_soul replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 8:22pm |
 Coolness: 56190 | Originally posted by ASTRO*NUT...
Originally posted by regimental911...
Straight up ,it's a slim to none chance that you come across a girl that wouldnt dump you for something"BETTER". More financvial stability,bigger cock,cuter face.It's simply therr nature to seek out the best mate and provider. Every girl on this earth has at least thought about cheating.and that in itself is a sin in my book. It's impossible to have a healthy relationship now a day's . im gonna say the last healthyrelationship was back in the jesus day's .where you can actually focus on your mate without technological interuptions,and a better moral standard. WQe're fucked ,we will never ever experience a relationship as it should be.The world is simply too fucked. Even though many people might not realizze it, there is a survival aspect to mate-picking. Often this instinct or drive or imperative does in part drive people to ditch one mate for another based on things that have value in this day and age. If you belive you will never have a good, healthy, relationship, you may just make it happen. My beef is that there is so much media, society and socialization, which conditions us with the idea that we need a boyfriend or a girlfriend to be happy. It is so not the case atleast I don't think so. I agree with you to some degree. I'm resolutely single and planning on staying this way. However, having been hurt deeply enough in my relationships has led me to be more cautious about entering into a relationship. I mean I am still getting to know this guy and it has been two years. I'd rather live without sex for the moment and focus on communication and building relationships. Why make the same mistake repeatedlt?! Jesus' day....?! In jesus' day, they crucified him and saved a murderer, over fear, private interest and blind, yet, strong obedience to authority. We are still doing this. I think your post has some truth value but it is quite pessimistic. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cinderella_soul replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 8:35pm |
| Coolness: 56190 | Ze'ev I would pick the first option. I could understand how people can cheat. I've always been one to encourage that the person tells me. It's something that happens. But if a person can be honest enough, needing to get it off their conscience and wanting to work things out , having admitted that they "cheated". I think it's commendable.
I have more to say but do not have the words to articulate it. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Choda_Bean replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 8:42pm |
 Coolness: 219960 | sum guy came over to my house today and told my moms everything........
my dad's been cheating on her with sum ugly fat bitch, for the past, oooh about 3 years now.... mom had her suspisions about it for a while, but its confirmed now. i caught the 2 of them holding hands once randomly downtown, like 3 years ago, and for sum reason never said anything to my dad about it, never told anybody else about it, and i feel really horrible for not telling my mom right away about it.... i think i just knew something bad would happen if i told her... like now moms movin out n shit, and who knows what kinda stunt she'll pull :s anyways, i just had all this poured into my head so gotta tell sumone else........... poopy caca |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» RedNatasha replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 9:13pm |
| Coolness: 35385 | been on all sides of the issue, sometimes our artner is wonderful but does not meet all our needs. right or wrong does not enter into it as an abstract. it is situational. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» El_Presidente replied on Tue May 10, 2005 @ 9:15pm |
 Coolness: 299315 | YOU DONT EXIST! |
Ever Been Cheated On?
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