happy birthday mang...im sending u a hooker via ups (united punani service)

if i may quote R Kelly,"you want me to pee on your face or in your hair"

i have thankfully never hear that track anywhere near a dancefloor...that song is a dancefloor destroyer....in a having sex with a rabid badger kinda way.

dude first date..here is a hint...the less you spend the more you get...fuck the date str8 to the backseat....buy a woman dinner and no sex for you...women perform much better sexually on an empty stomach.

as long as the women dress sexy the guys can dress like violent sex offenders for all i care...its gonna be about debaucherry and nothing else...alright everyone put your keys in the bowl...

you can dress like whatever you want as long as it is offensive to someone

french women rock!they arent afraid of a little love juice...

god told me to masterbate

the more you mix, the more you train your ear to pick up that hidden snare ...ect same applys in life..i remeber being so high when i went to see ben sims once that i had convinced myself i could here the track he was previewing in his headphones...the song i was thinking of actually came on and i flipped out.

drama is good...here i will start some....nick carter is gay and the girls he invites back after shows have nothing to look forward to in life but stained sheets and thighs that stick together

possible pimp and ho party going on the 31st...music in a cornfield so it might be a little rave type....pm if anyone is interested...bring your own beer and pharmaceuticals.

pills are for at the club...i already have my techno pharmacy kit ready for the preach thang....oh yeah fuck alex and kill a baby with a shrapnel cookie.

if you use the right stuff you can make dead rat taste good.after dinner is for the heavy binge drinking to make up for no booze at the club.

the trick is to make a butter at low heat with it so it doesnt burn when you cook with it...i'll pm ya the lasagna recipe that i have from this cool cooking with your buzz book i have

cookies were created by the nazi's to make people hate vegetables.

i have many recipes for trippy meals...i make a wikked chicken and spinach psychadelic pizza...no those mushrooms arent from iga and that is not oregano.

people who eat cookies kill babies...fuck fur is murder

think more along the lines of 3 types of hash bautter...some weed sprinkles all laced into a rhum chocolate cookie...made some for the bush party we had this weekend. the titties were flashed...that is how i do quality control...if i see tit i know i made a good cookie.

you havent had cookies until you have tried my 20$ cookie....you Will hallucinate.

dead baby cookies are so in right now...

i agree...some nights i would end up drunk at 3am and starting more shit than fixing....i wouldn't hire me.

its funny how the word rave has gone out of style...the original ravers have progressed into clubbers...your time will come too one day as it is the circle of life *sings that gay ass song from the lion king movie*

no matter how good a fake id is, a good bouncer will always find a way to get you....when i used to work door i would ask what sign they were....man thats funny....how can you have a fake id and not know your fake name or birthday.

we all have had that problem...the funny thing is everytime i date a girl and she introduces me to her friends i am extra nice.the ladies think you are trying to be involved in their life when the only thing you are getting involved in is figuring which one you are going to sleep with when the time comes....everyone wins!

hmmm....did you try the hit and run? you hit the doorman in the nuts and rush to drink as much as you can before you get kicked out...

make me an ass and tittie cookie and the world is yours...just no hair please

you need to bake me some of that stuff in your pic....my favorite number is 23

yup...they had every damn colour in the world...pockets everywhere...AND were big enough to hide a weeks supply of drugs and ammo....

Le D dont bust em...i can use them for my automated ass wiping machine that is currently awaiting patent....direct drive ass wiping is just plain crazy...

i shot john lennon...no hassles making me feel bad about it..

you dont need one....i've been going to bars for over 10 years and i am 26...never had a fake id, all you need to be chill and not look like you are 12.

the best thing to do to an ex who wont leave you alone is sleep with all of her friends....it makes her want you more...even if it doesnt at least you can answer,"your friend doesnt complain when i try anal on her."

Axel F...funny how his name is like Axel Foley the character in the movie....that song sets back edm in so many different ways...kill the frog...thank christ the only place it plays on the radio..anyone who would be crazy enough to play that in a club would be hanged for sure.

stupid crazy frog...how dare they use beverhill cops shit in a bad song...

i wish i was as smart as Bush..then i wouldn't have to wear velcro shoes....

sahara-armin van buuren

the pants monster has been awoken....

i like to wear empty cans with strings attached to him and pretend i am cool.

perscription medication to make the ouchies go away...it is the weakest opiate derivative.

is getting really drunk and telling a cop to shove his maglite up his ass a bad trip???it felt like one...