Polyamoury
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Holly_Golightly replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 2:08pm |
 Coolness: 158740 | I think people should all go read Shere Hite's books! |
| I'm feeling hitched right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» databoy replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 2:09pm |
 Coolness: 106120 | Daf, I wouldn't lend too much importance to the insight given by high school kids on relationships.
Besides, they where probably calling you a lesbian because they though you where hot and where frustrated because you turned them down. ;) |
| I'm feeling impervia right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Holly_Golightly replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 2:17pm |
| Coolness: 158740 | yeah i mean growing up in the 90's.. being a girl going around on a skateboard listening to crazy brutal music and not being prompt to degrading social behaviors was enough to be called a lesbian in the average high school. ha! |
| I'm feeling hitched right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Daf replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 2:19pm |
 Coolness: 185360 | hahaha yeah... highschool!
it's fun to read that people think being romantic is the norm, when i've been thinking all those years that i was born at the wrong time those ideas/opinions are definitely produce by our entourage, and it's after the years that i understood that it's alright to be different from them, if everyone respect each other :) |
| I'm feeling kiss me, im shitface right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» prrr replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 3:20pm |
 Coolness: 43650 | Meh. I never meant to make anyone upset with it. I meant that, biologically, men have the urge to be with *more* women and spread themselves. It doesn't mean that women aren't capable of wanting to be with more than one also, but it's not as common.
From all the people I've listened to about it, my impression is that there are more men who want open relationships than women. And, sex is FAR more easy to get for women than it is for men. Because men seek it out more. I thought this was commonly acknowledged? So assuming that men and women are equally honest and dishonest, given that men in general have more natural desire to have multiple partners, it makes sense that there would be more men cheating than women. But! It's completely irrelevant! Such a big deal was made out of nothing! I don't care to argue about this, I'm not pointing fingers at anyone or bashing any gender. Women in general aren't as good as men at lifting weights and playing chess. So what? Does that make me anti-women because I acknowledge it? Does it mean that all women are bad at lifting weights and playing chess, or that they don't have other talents? No.. Music's a very important thing for me, I wasn't asking to be bashed over using it to explain how I feel. I see the relation between them in the ways that it matters for the purpose of this conversation so I used it to show how I can like A and B at the same time and that one can even help me with my appreciation for the other. There's no need for you to be so hostile as there wasn't any hostility in the first place. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Holly_Golightly replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 3:27pm |
| Coolness: 158740 | i'm not hostile or upset; i just found your analogy stupid. |
| I'm feeling hitched right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» prrr replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 3:43pm |
| Coolness: 43650 | Alright then :) How about saying "I don't agree with your analogy" instead of name-calling. IMO that's the more mature thing to do. Thanks! |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Masa replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 3:46pm |
 Coolness: 158775 | She didn't call you names, she herself made an analogy ;) |
| I'm feeling fully circled right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» prrr replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 3:48pm |
| Coolness: 43650 | She called me retarded for it, and also related me to another age group, in a derogatory way. I'm not too fond of monogamy for myself, but TO EACH THEIR OWN, I don't think it's right to tell monogamists that they're retarded etc. Even if I strongly disagree with their analogies. Update » prrr wrote on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 3:55pm But whatever, think I'm "retarded" for using how I feel about music as an example to help explain how I feel about love. You don't have to understand it, go ahead and insult over it too if it really does something for you. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Masa replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:05pm |
| Coolness: 158775 | She called your analogy retarded, yes. You take things too personal, IMHO.
As for your stand on monogamy, I won't judge it. I love many people, but I don't necessarily sleep with all of them. And I prefer intimacy with only one person at a time. I also could get all pissy about the generalizations you made about my gender. But I'll simply say this: methinks you got hurt by one or more men who cheated you, and that polyamoury/polygamist stand you now preach derives from a defense mechanism you built in order not to get hurt again. Whatever. No, I don't think you're retarded. To each their own indeed. But for fuck's sake, learn to take criticism. |
| I'm feeling fully circled right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Holly_Golightly replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:06pm |
| Coolness: 158740 | *roll eyes* isssssh meeeoowwwwwww
haha ok then; i don't agree with majority of your arguments and don't agree with how you formulate or find causality in your ideas/arguments. i like how majority of peeps here talk/discuss for themselves in such a private subject matter and that YOU come here telling us how YOU think marriage should be or how long term relationships or women or male are; for example: Even if you love your partner and want to be with them for the rest of your life, after 1, 5, 10 years it could be good for both partners and their relationship to put some other music into the mix, with each others' knowledge, instead of keeping each other as posessions and cheating on each other or letting go of other great intimate connections.
so if you express ideas of this kind .. on forums.. well some people will not agree and answer.. don't be too sensitive.. im not hostile or upset or anything ... but you obviously are..relax girrl.. |
| I'm feeling hitched right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» LeChat replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:13pm |
 Coolness: 115540 |  |
| I'm feeling fly with me right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Holly_Golightly replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:15pm |
| Coolness: 158740 | Originally Posted By LECHAT
exactly. |
| I'm feeling hitched right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» LeChat replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:17pm |
| Coolness: 115540 |  |
| I'm feeling fly with me right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:18pm |
 Coolness: 685595 | |
| I'm feeling like a drama magnet right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» LeChat replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:19pm |
| Coolness: 115540 | I WIN! YAAAYYY
 |
| I'm feeling fly with me right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:21pm |
| Coolness: 685595 |  |
| I'm feeling like a drama magnet right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» prrr replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:31pm |
| Coolness: 43650 | I'm not "preaching" polyamory... this is a thread for people to share their views about it and I shared mine. You're acting like you're the only one entitled to preaching your views. I've had monogamy "preached" to me all my life.
My monogamous boyfriends with the exception of one didn't cheat on me (as far as I know) and that one was a looong time ago so no fresh feelings there. I don't harbor any bad feelings towards men at all, this is completely not about emotional reaction. I've already written that a few times. My assumptions about more men cheating than women are based in 1. logic and 2. online communities I'm part of and from conversations with many, many men. 28% cheat? If that statistic is right, that's a LOT. And since women don't in general have as high of a desire to spread their seed/be with many... it makes logical sense. It doesn't make men or women better than one another. Maybe it means that in general men are more desiring of open relationships but they don't feel like their partners could handle it, so they just hide the intimate experiences they are going to have anyways so that they can keep doing their thing without hurting their partner. I've talked to ALOT of people who are along those lines. I'm not upset lol I'm just writing down my thoughts... not crying a river over someone being immature enough to use ageism and "retarded" in their insults. but it's stupid as this started out as a civil discussion where everyone could freely express their thoughts without taking chunks out of each other. It doesn't make me weak if I ask for you to not use insults. I ask out of a desire for respect, not because I'm desperate for your approval. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» AYkiN0XiA replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:31pm |
 Coolness: 166580 | Myth No. 2: Men Cheat Much More Than Women Do
This used to be the case, but now the infidelity scales are balancing out. Why? Women cheat for the same reasons as men: It's someone new. It's naughty (and therefore nice). However, there are other reasons women cite: The affair was a "reward" for being an unappreciated wife and mother or for putting up with a partner who wasn't affectionate, didn't listen or ignored them. It was an "ego boost." (Gone are the days when we'd treat ourselves to a new lipstick or haircut to cheer ourselves up.) We're still not as blase about affairs as men -- women are more likely to feel guilty -- but given that studies show we're much better at lying, we're also more likely to get away with it. [ ca.askmen.com ] [ ezinearticles.com ] [ www.selfgrowth.com ] in my experience we're pretty equal on the cheating thing... temptation is temptation :P in my experience though it's true that there are more men than women who want an open relationship. that has something to do with the need for women to find a provider of material security for them and the possible baby, as men biologically are more free... |
| I'm feeling the snow <3 right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» prrr replied on Mon Jan 31, 2011 @ 4:35pm |
| Coolness: 43650 | Originally Posted By YOSHIN
Myth No. 2: Men Cheat Much More Than Women Do This used to be the case, but now the infidelity scales are balancing out. [ ca.askmen.com ] [ ezinearticles.com ] [ www.selfgrowth.com ] I guess I have to get with the times ^.^ So it's balancing out. Are we there yet? :p |
Polyamoury
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