Insert Jokes Here...
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» ufot replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 12:59pm |
a friend of mine proposed that the art of jokes as a social lubricant/spark is dead because of the web.... I'm curious to see if this is even remotely true, so, please, post some of the funniest jokes you've heard lately...
Ufot-cause if no one posts, it means no one tells jokes anymore and my friend was right... | |
I'm feeling happy as a panda with car troubl right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» DrGonzo replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 1:38pm |
qu'est-ce qui est jaune et qui passe a travers les murs?
- une banane magique qu'est-ce qui est rouge au bas d'un mur? - une tomate qui s'est prise pour une banane magique qu'est-ce qui est jaune et qui fait pitie? - aurore l'enfant banane pourquoi les castors ont la queue plate? - pcq les canards n'arretent pas de les sucer I know a few racist jokes too but they're probably terrible and I don't want to become a pariah. | |
I'm feeling gimme crackpipe right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Daf replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 1:41pm |
How do you kill a one-legged fox?
Make him run across Canada. | |
I'm feeling kiss me, im shitface right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» DrGonzo replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 1:47pm |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Daf replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 1:52pm |
:D
c'est ma meilleure celle là en plus !! haha | |
I'm feeling kiss me, im shitface right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» ufot replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 1:53pm |
what is the hardest part about roller blading?
-telling your parents you're gay! what is the hardest part about going to a leafs game? -roller blading home! Ufot-lame is still funny, sometimes... | |
I'm feeling happy as a panda with car troubl right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Daf replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 1:56pm |
Originally Posted By UFOT
what is the hardest part about roller blading? -telling your parents you're gay! hahaha never heard it before, and I love it!! hahaha im so telling that joke none stop super drunk at chritsmas | |
I'm feeling kiss me, im shitface right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Masa replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 2:00pm |
Excluding the Leafs part for your bf's sake, I'm sure :) | |
I'm feeling fiendish right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Daf replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 2:05pm |
oh i'll just do the gay roller blade joke haha
the other one wasn't good and Leafs sucks :P | |
I'm feeling kiss me, im shitface right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Smashley506 replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 2:17pm |
TORONTO , ONTARIO (CP) -
A seven-year-old Toronto , Ontario boy was at the center of a Toronto city courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents & the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law & regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents & he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy alleged they had also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family & learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references & confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Toronto Maple Leafs, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone. | |
I'm feeling impatient right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Sparklz replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 2:20pm |
Originally Posted By SMASHLEY506
TORONTO , ONTARIO (CP) - A seven-year-old Toronto , Ontario boy was at the center of a Toronto city courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents & the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law & regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents & he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy alleged they had also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family & learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references & confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Toronto Maple Leafs, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone. FKN WIN! | |
I'm feeling kapow! right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Gamos replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 2:20pm |
Whats my favorite chocolate bar? A kit kat
Which color is best? Purple Do I have asthma? Yes | |
I'm feeling a message in a bottl right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Mutante replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 2:49pm |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 4:53pm |
Originally Posted By SMASHLEY506
TORONTO , ONTARIO (CP) - A seven-year-old Toronto , Ontario boy was at the center of a Toronto city courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents & the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law & regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents & he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy alleged they had also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family & learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references & confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Toronto Maple Leafs, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that's fucking awesome! | |
I'm feeling like a drama magnet right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Smashley506 replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 4:54pm |
Originally Posted By SCREWHEAD
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that's fucking awesome! Ya, I thought it was pretty funny, lol. | |
I'm feeling impatient right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» FUCKERS replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 6:18pm |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» flo replied on Tue Dec 8, 2009 @ 10:59pm |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Choda_Bean replied on Wed Dec 9, 2009 @ 5:45am |
What's the difference between acne and priests?
Acne comes on a boy's face AFTER he turns 13. What's black, blue and hates sex? The 10 year old in my closet. What's the best thing about a 12 yr old girl? Get her in the shower, slick her hair back, and she looks like an 8 yr old boy. What's better than sex with a 6 yr old girl? nothin' man.....nothin'........ What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken. guy goes down on this chick and comes up with something in his mouth, spits it out and does'nt think much of it. goes back down and gets something else in his mouth and freaks "what..are you sick?" he yells she replies " no.. but the guy before you was" why dont blacks and mexicans marry?? because their afraid their kids will be too lazy to steal How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? put a queer in a coma. What do you say to a Muslim woman with two black eyes? Nothing! You told her twice already! How does a redneck woman know when her daughter's on the rag? Her son's dick tastes nasty. A man is dying of cancer. His son: "Dad why you keep telling people you're dying of AIDS??". "So that when I die, no one will dare screw your mother." What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An erection. What would martin luther king be if he was white? Alive What do steroids and the KKK have in common? They both make blacks run faster What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common? They both leave kids' rooms with empty sacks What happens when a Jew with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose. Why do you put a baby in the blender feet first? So you can see the expression on it's face! Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt! why dont women need to drive? cus there isnt a road between the stove and my cock why dont women need watches cus theres a clock on the oven, microwave, and coffee machine what did the blonds right leg say to the left? nothing, they have never met whats the difference between black man and bat man? bat man can go out with out robin A doctor in the maternity ward takes a baby from a cot and starts spinning it around by its ankles, smashing it into walls, drop kicking it down the corridors, etc. The mom runs after him, hysterical, screaming and crying and asks him what the hell he is doing. He says "Aah April Fools! It was dead anyway!" | |
I'm feeling like a sketchbook! right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» flo replied on Wed Dec 9, 2009 @ 8:23am |
Originally Posted By DJ_DIALECT
What happens when a Jew with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose. Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt! whats the difference between black man and bat man? bat man can go out with out robin hahahahhhhhh :) :) :) | |
I'm feeling fresh doctor :) right now.. |
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Daf replied on Wed Dec 9, 2009 @ 8:37am |
oh wow
hahahaha that was so bad and so good! | |
I'm feeling kiss me, im shitface right now.. |
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