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Hilariousness
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» mdc replied on Wed Aug 3, 2005 @ 11:38am
mdc
Coolness: 148795
Read this... guaranteed laugh

On the WBAM FM morning show in Chicago, the DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called "Mate Match." The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers yes, he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions.

The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner (with phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

One particular game, however, several months ago made the City of Big Shoulders drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing I've heard yet. Anyway, here's how it all went down:

DJ: "Hey! This is Edgar on WBAM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?"

Contestant: (laughing) "Yes I have."

DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to Orlando,Florida if you win. What is your name? First only please."

Contestant: "Brian."

DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?"

Brian: "Yes."

DJ: "Yes? Does that mean you're married or you're what?"

Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."

DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please."

Brian: "Sara."

DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"

Brian: "She is gonna kill me."

DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"

Brian: (laughing) Yes, she's at work."

DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"

Brian: "She is gonna kill me."

DJ: "Brian! Stay with me here!"

Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."

DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"

Brian: "About 10 minutes."

DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake."

Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."

DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?"

Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."

DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?"

Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her Mom is staying for a couple of weeks..."

DJ: "Uh huh..."

Brian: "...and the Mother-in-law was in the shower at the Time."

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

Brian: "On the kitchen table."

DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up. You listen to this. (3 minutes of commercials follow.)

DJ: "Okay audience, let's call Sarah, shall we?" (touchtones ringing)

Clerk: "Kinkos."

DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"

Clerk: "This is she."

DJ: "Sarah, this is Edgar with WBAM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now."

Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"

DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo...do you know the rules of 'Mate match'?"

Sarah: "No."

DJ: "Good!"

Brian: (laughing)

Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"

Brian (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest."

DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to Orlando, Florida for 5 days on us. Disney World. Sea World. Tickets to the Magic's game. The whole deal. Get it Sarah?"

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "All right. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"

Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work."

DJ: "What time?"

Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."

DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"

Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."

DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question,

Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to Florida. Are you ready?"

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "Where did you have it?"

Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that, did you?"

Brian: "Just tell him, honey."

DJ: "What is bothering you so much,Sarah?"

Sarah: "Well, it's just that my Mom is vacationing with us and..."

DJ: "She saw?"

Sarah: "BRIAN?!"

Brian: "No, no I didn't..."

DJ: "Ease up there, sister. Just messing' with your head. Your answer, please?"

Sara: "Dear Lord...I cannot believe you told them this."

Brian: "Come on, honey, it's for a free trip to Florida."

DJ: "Let's go, sister. We ain't got all day here. Where did you do it?"

Sarah: (short pause) "In the ass."

(long, long pause)

DJ: "We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors."
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cactain_steef replied on Wed Aug 3, 2005 @ 11:46am
cactain_steef
Coolness: 154655
HAhAHAHAHAHAHAH...omaygad.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Wed Aug 3, 2005 @ 1:10pm
neoform
Coolness: 339645
wow, she's daft.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» regimental911 replied on Wed Aug 3, 2005 @ 1:14pm
regimental911
Coolness: 134250
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa.OOOOOHHHHHHHH,LOLOLOLOLOLOLLLOOLLO

PAUSE'

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA.

THAT IS TOO FUCKIN FUNNY.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead replied on Wed Aug 3, 2005 @ 3:04pm
screwhead
Coolness: 685570
:lol that fucking rocks
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» earthyspirit replied on Wed Aug 3, 2005 @ 5:05pm
earthyspirit
Coolness: 229655
absolutely rocks lol nice1!
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» provoke replied on Thu Aug 4, 2005 @ 1:32am
provoke
Coolness: 36875
so....
she goin ta florida or what?
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cvxn replied on Fri Aug 5, 2005 @ 11:01am
cvxn
Coolness: 178625
HAHAHAH!! Good one! :D
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» basdini replied on Fri Aug 5, 2005 @ 5:53pm
basdini
Coolness: 145180
bum sex is funny...
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» G__ replied on Tue Aug 9, 2005 @ 8:45pm
g__
Coolness: 141345
amazing
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» BA_Baracus replied on Wed Aug 10, 2005 @ 2:31pm
ba_baracus
Coolness: 121015
hahha
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» AlienZeD replied on Thu Aug 11, 2005 @ 6:32pm
alienzed
Coolness: 509540
lmao
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» cactain_steef replied on Thu Aug 11, 2005 @ 6:34pm
cactain_steef
Coolness: 154655
bump!
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» GAK replied on Wed Aug 17, 2005 @ 4:55pm
gak
Coolness: 51045
hahahah gold!
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Zz.ee.vV replied on Tue May 2, 2006 @ 12:44am
zz.ee.vv
Coolness: 194005
hehe this classic is friggin awesome.

On that note,

[ video.google.com ]

is fucking hilarious as well.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Trey replied on Tue May 2, 2006 @ 4:06am
trey
Coolness: 102745
The same thing happen in a gameshown "the newlyweds" in the 70's or early 80's, live on TV.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» moondancer replied on Tue May 2, 2006 @ 10:12am
moondancer
Coolness: 92245
Did they win?
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» AlienZeD replied on Thu May 4, 2006 @ 5:05pm
alienzed
Coolness: 509540
that video is hilarious
[ video.google.com ]
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» DrGonzo replied on Mon May 8, 2006 @ 12:09pm
drgonzo
Coolness: 265935
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Mico replied on Mon May 8, 2006 @ 2:07pm
mico
Coolness: 150440
Hahaha... ohh. That's some good shit.
Hilariousness
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