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Technical Support Problems
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» blah123 a répondu le Sun 6 Aug, 2006 @ 9:44am |
 Coolness: 46905 | Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one... =============== Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out. Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button? Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck. Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note. Customer: No, wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still ! on my desk... sorry.... =============== Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left? =============== Tech support: Good day. How may I help you? Male customer: Hello... I can't print. Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and... Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates. =============== Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it... =============== Customer: I have problems printing in red... Tech support: Do you have a color printer? Customer: Aaaah....................thank you. =============== Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11. =============== Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore. Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer. Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. Customer:! OK Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you? Customer: Yes Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard? Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work... =============== Tech support: Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple, a capital letter V as n Victor, the number 7. Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters? == ============= Customer: can't get on the Internet. Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password? Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was? Customer: Five stars. =============== Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use? Customer: Netscape. Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program. Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer. =============== Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears. =============== Tech support: How may I help you? Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem? Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it? =============== A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. Tech support: Are you running it under windows? Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine." =============== And last but not least... Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager." Customer: I don't have a P. Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob. Customer: What do you mean? Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob. Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT! |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead a répondu le Sun 6 Aug, 2006 @ 10:09am |
 Coolness: 685625 | lol, the worst part is that I've heard stupid shit like that when fixing other people's fuckups. |
| I'm feeling sleepy right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Bad_Chemistry a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 2:00am |
 Coolness: 73120 | Here's a funny one:
Me: Alright, can you open up the control pannel Friend: *Rustling for 20-30 seconds* Friend: Alright I got the tower open, but I don't see anything that looks like a control pannel. Me: Silence Friend: Does it have a fan connected to it? |
| I'm feeling serotonin deprived right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» blah123 a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 5:49am |
| Coolness: 46905 | LOL. Nice. |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» DrGonzo a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 11:03am |
 Coolness: 265990 | Originally Posted By DMTIO
Here's a funny one: Me: Alright, can you open up the control pannel Friend: *Rustling for 20-30 seconds* Friend: Alright I got the tower open, but I don't see anything that looks like a control pannel. Me: Silence Friend: Does it have a fan connected to it? rofl. |
| I'm feeling fooked right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Da_Hand a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 2:52pm |
 Coolness: 42075 | Ha ha, these are great :) |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Screwhead a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 2:58pm |
| Coolness: 685625 | God I just remembered being on the phone with a friend once, the conversation went something like this:
me: Ok, double click on my computer him: Uhmmmm. I can't. me: Why not?! him: Well, your not online me: ...on your desktop, "My Computer"... |
| I'm feeling sleepy right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» AlienZeD a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 3:15pm |
 Coolness: 509595 | hehe nice :)
"I use a cable modem ISP, one of North America's largest ISPs. During one of their interminable outages, I called to demand what the problem was. Tech Support: "Is your computer on? Is the modem plugged in?" Me: "Yes, it's on and working fine. The modem's plugged in, but it isn't getting anything from your end." Tech Support: "Ok, can you click on the 'Start' button and type 'WINIPCFG'--" Me: "Yes, I know. My IP is listed as 169.XXX.XXX.XXX." This IP was the one Windows 98 usually gives when it's supposed to have one assigned to it but doesn't get one. Tech Support: "Well, sir, that's the problem." Me: "Yes, I know. I'm getting no IP. I'm not in the network." Tech Support: "No, sir, the problem is that you're using a Mac." Er.... Me: "I'm sorry?" Tech Support: "Sir, your IP is a Mac IP. You're not using a PC." Me: "Uhhh, I am using a PC. It's a Dell with an Intel PII-450 CPU. I'm running Windows 98." Tech Support: "No, sir. Your IP indicates that your computer is a Mac. IPs that start with those numbers are used by Macs." Me: "You know, I don't think it works that way. I'm pretty certain IPs are assigned based on where the computer is in a domain and a subdomain and such. I know all your IPs assigned in this area start with XXX. And I'm quite certain my computer is a PC." Tech Support: "I don't think we use 'domain' here." Me: "Can I speak to a supervisor, please?"" |
| I'm feeling hungover right now.. | |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» blah123 a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 6:07pm |
| Coolness: 46905 | huh? Did you straighten things out with the supervisor? Well that goes to show the kinda stuff those "tech support" ppl get, I mean to think the caller dosen't know if he's using a PC or a Mac! :) |
| Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» AlienZeD a répondu le Mon 7 Aug, 2006 @ 7:37pm |
| Coolness: 509595 | dunno, that wasn't actually me... I am actually a Comp Sci student in Uni so I would have stopped him WAY before. Ip addresses are platform inspecific. |
| I'm feeling hungover right now.. | |
Technical Support Problems
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