FORMER ADDICT SHINES LIGHT ON TEEN DRUG ABUSE

When I was growing up, I never expected to become addicted to drugs
and enter into a world of crime, violence and despair. But that is
exactly what happened, despite outwardly having all the advantages of
a middle-class home and lifestyle. My parents -- mother, father and
stepfather -- were all psychologists, but they had no idea about the
road I headed down at a very early age.

My family was like many modern families, and we went through common
struggles -- divorce, blended family, tight financial times and
teenage conflict. Early on, I found that if I got high, I felt better.
I also felt a sense of belonging, because I used drugs with my
friends. Over time, the drugs became my way of dealing with the chaos
at home, rejection by my father, my own feelings of inadequacy, and
with any uncomfortable, boring or stressful situation.

My father left us when I was 10. Four years later, my stepfather came
into my life. During the intervening years, I was adrift without a
strong male influence in my life. My mother did what she could for me,
but she was busy going to university and trying to make enough money
for us to survive. Since no one was around to discipline and guide me,
I did whatever I wanted, and mostly I wanted to do drugs. My druggy
friends took the place of my family, and they did not require anything
from me except having the drugs and sharing them.

Because my mother, and then my stepfather, were so busy trying to get
a business going, and I seemed fairly self-sufficient, my behaviour
went unnoticed. I got caught occasionally, but when my parents tried
to confront me, I would lie and make up excuses, always promising not
to do it again. My mother would be very upset, but soon the situation
would blow over and I would be back to using drugs, then even dealing
drugs right in their home.

Having an older brother who was much more obvious with his drug use
and unacceptable behaviour also made it easier for me to slide by
without getting caught. So much attention was focused on his antics
and cleaning up his messes that I was able to hide in plain sight.

When I got caught at school doing unacceptable things, my mother would
go in swinging, usually getting me out of whatever trouble I was in.
She gave me the benefit of the doubt every time. The school just did
what it could, even though they knew I was dealing drugs and using
every day. Without the support of my parents, the principal could do
nothing.

I quickly got used to being untouchable. By the time my parents were
aware of the extent of my addiction and what I did to support it, I
was 16. They organized an intervention and tried to get me into
treatment, but I was self-sufficient at this point, had money and drug
customers. My parents were shocked when I walked out and did not
accept their help.

I felt free after leaving home, and my behaviour got worse and worse.
I dealt more drugs, kidnapped and extorted a guy who stole from me,
started growing marijuana and buying guns.

Eventually I was involved in a home invasion to steal a marijuana crop
while under house arrest and probation following a jail term. My life
was completely out of control, but to me it was normal.

A couple of years after I left my parent's home, I had a court date
and was ordered to either get a job or go to school. I enrolled at
Mount Royal College to do some upgrading. My mother was thrilled, and
she started giving me money to cover my expenses. I eagerly took the
cash and used it to buy more drugs, but my mother was just happy to
believe that I had grown up and put my drug use behind me.

At the end of my drug use I ended up phoning my mother and telling her
I wanted to quit using drugs. She was shocked that I was still doing
drugs, but quickly offered to help. My parents had helped bring AARC,
the Alberta Adolescent Recovery Centre to Calgary, and I was sent for
an assessment.

That day I entered treatment, and ended up staying until I graduated a
year later. My family went through treatment with me, going to group
sessions, taking clients into their home like all the other families,
and we became a real family for the first time. We all dealt with
issues and learned to be better people.

Today I am grateful for my parents and sister for joining me in AARC,
and for all the work they did there.

They finally learned the devastating truth about my addiction and went
to great lengths to help me and themselves. We were the fifth family
to graduate AARC, and now there are 300 families graduated. But this
just scratches the surface, as many families are faced with addicted
kids.

I am hopeful that my story will help parents to open their eyes to the
fact addiction can strike any family, but there is help if it is
sought and hope if there is still life. Never give up on your children
and they may surprise you!

To learn more about the Alberta Adolescent Recovery Centre visit
http://www.aarc.ab.ca or check out his website, http://www.demonandmonk.com.