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2009 December:
[ ]First Entryyy
[ ]optimisme pour 2010 ? oui svp .
[ ]festivus eve 09
[ ]Stuff I want.
[ ]BORING - DJ IN THE BOX!
[ ]Some one please ABORT the youth of America
2009 November:
[ ]written while stoned . 1
[ ]le feu arrive dans mon reve
[ ]Cy-Fi Double Feature
[ ]Playing @ Passport on Wednesday the 25th
[ ]Never Fear, I is Here!!!!
[ ]mille chose a dire, aucune de consciente
[ ]Droid Phone rant
[ ]La joke d'la chaise électrique (texte de t'chat)
[ ]One of my weird dreams
2009 October:
[ ]twilight
[ ]eighteen days without you.
[ ]faire une carte géo-onirique
[ ]New Podcast online !
[ ]Total Request Rave 4 in Toronto - Nov, 14
[ ]back to montreal
2009 September:
[ ]like a spark.
[ ]ho ho fucking ho
[ ]URGENT DJ RECHERCHÉ
[ ]covoiturage pour Lune Noir
[ ]13 sept 2009
[ ]Journal? Journal?!
[ ]l'effroie dans le rêve
[ ]r.a.s. sous le soleil
2009 August:
[ ]Big Foot Paintball
[ ]NEW IN TOWN: THE RAVE MASTA
[ ]tout seul
[ ]A Raver's Manifesto
2009 July:
[ ]scrape noise
[ ]The Search for Lucy
[ ]arôme de montreal
[ ]New podasct online
2009 June:
[ ]DEEP TRIBE (Tribal podcast)
[ ]PROFESSIONAL 'DJ MIXSET' RECORDING SERVICES
[ ]Les yeux des autres
[ ]Unique au monde
[ ]1 peu comme le mystère des bas qui disparaissent
[ ]feu sans papiers
[ ]LETHAL STATE - DJ IN THE BOX! OUT NOW
[ ]DJ IN THE BOX! the album
[ ]Vente équitable de musique en ligne
[ ]pink
[ ]Fin des téléchargements gratuits
2009 May:
[ ]ROLLING the MOVIE is finally available to purchase on DVD at http://rollingmovie.com
[ ]ROLLING in HOLLYWOOD on Sat 5/23 @ CiINESPACE
[ ]Caaaaaalice!
[ ]CumDumpster
[ ]du nimportequoi avec sherley et mayo
[ ]Rolling San Diego Premiere!! Special Midnight Screening
[ ]béton
[ ]NEW PODCAST ONLINE
[ ]Communication
[ ]CASA CARACOL GOA HOUSE OUT OF TIME XILITLA MEXICO
[ ]Rolling Los Angeles Midnight Screening May 08
[ ]NEW RELEASE on MySpace
2009 April:
[ ]Tonneau sur la 217 Sud ..
[ ]New live set! Saiyan live @ DreamHard 03-14-09 (NYC)
[ ]New Mix!!1 Saiyan - All My Hoes
[ ]Le comportement humain en chaos contrôlé.
[ ]celui qui m'est trop commun
[ ]slipnot
[ ]DRUM'N'BASS TO HARDCORE
[ ]FINALS
[ ]durant une travail de hantise
[ ]"SO DELIRIOUS" Mashup Party 1 Saturday May 09th
[ ]we real cool
2009 March:
[ ]Mystic Knowledge 6
[ ]PODCAST Simon Patterson anthem
[ ]Kumiko
[ ]Word .. Kinda like pr?
[ ]Your comments / Vos commentaires
[ ]Lankavatara Sutra (got Ego problems?)
[ ]Nouveau PODCAST / New PODCAST
2009 February:
[ ]Nouvelle Compo en ligne ! New beat online
[ ]Mystic knowledge 5
[ ]Mystic knowledge 4
[ ]Mystic knowledge 3
[ ]Mystic knowledge 2
[ ]New Podcast online EPISODE 07
[ ]im blind
[ ]hahaha
2009 January:
[ ]butterfly
[ ]I'll take the high road, you take the low road?
[ ]a message to the world
[ ]corps ici,tete la bas
[ ]Mystic knowledge
[ ]PODCAST 06 Kamil Polner anthem
[ ]TRUE WILL
[ ]400 fois intense
Title:eighteen days without you.
Posted On:2009-10-19 19:48:16
Posted By:» katatomic
I
i don’t miss you.
my walls stayed white.
my eyes stayed blue.
that disordering of senses
promised for so long
is undelivered.
nothing is breathing
except a taut beauty
where the sheets are drying.

II
there is no heart.
lifted like swimming
i am more weightless
than one hundred small fish.
but i am out of water
and i am going bad.
there is no heart
in an ocean.

III
my eyes are open, naturally.
if i could sleep
i would dream of white crows
pecking my ego down to size.
instead, my eyes
cannot even close to blink.
i thought i saw you
looking in the freezer for vodka.

IV
and where did we meet?
the night you lied
and said it was poetry,
and not the way
my lips moved as i read it
that you liked.
but you admitted it later,
it was my lips all the time.

V
that was a cold september
and you without running water
traded secrets for a shower
i was the writer and you did all the talking
my other asked me if one of the languages
you spoke was "kat".

VI
with an armspan that almost doubled mine,
he speaks of my friendly cruxifixion.
but a man who holds back,
who denies me my piercing
when it is precisely that
which i require,
that man makes me strong
when the blood in my hands
is weak.

VII
i mark the hours like some
mark days.
4am is a holiday.
it is a solstice.
the longest hour of the night.

VIII
i am uncomfortable in my own bed.
i am remembering a breakfast,
our first,
when i was embarassed
to swallow. funny how
that morning’s coffee
still keeps me awake.

IX
you are not a soldier.
you are duty-free.
i read your poetry and
you read mine
and i wondered if we were
fighting the same war.
even when you loan me a book,
i study the bookmark
as a map to your territory.
those scraps are the details
you’ve forgotten
and the cities you’ve seized.

X
i see it coming.
dawn is the most silent
catastrophe around.
but i cannot afford sunlight.
literally. cheap apartments
are surrounded, and mine
is always dark.
my ears slide on sheets
that held our conversation
about how you are not my boyfriend.
and you said "yet,"
not me.

XI
and i think of your mouth.
the funny way
it twists around french words
and how you suck my tongue
like a suicide
in a locked garage
with the engine on.
but my need to breathe
is as eloquent
as any frenchman’s kiss.

XII
such a good lie
to say
"i have no memories"
no still-life snapshots
no motion pictures
of little bites above my knees
and little bruises rising.
i could see them
if i crossed my eyes.
but to remember is to lie
and no perfect memory
can touch me, can leave those marks
with such gorgeous perfection.

XIII
i sing a song
of teatotalers.
drunk only with sleep,
that stranger, that tease,
i tell the joke
that is decaf.
bitter and useless
as old age.

XIV
"a couple of kids"
you called us, as if
we meet each day to skip rope.
as if tetherball was foreplay
and i was your hopscotch virgin.
do you remember growing up?
i remember pretending to.

XV
1pm is almost christmas.
i will freeze your vodka
and hang parsley over my door
and we will pretend.
you will come with your full bag
and stir me like pudding.
i have counted the hours and the days
between the birds and the bees
and it is now.

XVI
find me in the doorwat
come time your breaths
in sync with the spaces
between my ribs.
homing pigeon,
come squeeze your notes
into me.
we can ignore the stroke of 2pm
in favour of our own holiday.
you can pretend to forget.
i will loan you a pillow
and later we will sleep
like two bulbs that
must be switched off,
occasionally.

Listening To: in for the kill // la roux (skream remix)
Member Comments
» Smashley506 said @ Wed Dec 30, 2009 @ 7:18pm
Beauty.