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Funny But True
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» ontheroadagain replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 1:18am
ontheroadagain
Coolness: 54560
Normally i hate forwarded emails but this one was kinda cute :)

How to Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, use long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» flatlinedive replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 1:20am
flatlinedive
Coolness: 64130
hahahahahahhahahahha
woo wooo
shampoo mohawk
hahahahhaahhhhahahhahaha
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» daFTWin replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 1:24am
daftwin
Coolness: 276660
HAHAHA.. alot of those are true for both men and women.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Unknown User replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 1:26am
unknown%20user
Coolness: 15440
yum
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Unknown User replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 1:27am
unknown%20user
Coolness: 15440
yum
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» neoform replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 1:29am
neoform
Coolness: 339890
the "pee" part was the best.
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» Zz.ee.vV replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 10:59am
zz.ee.vv
Coolness: 194250
shampoo mohawk sounds cool

next time i shower im makin' one! :lol
Good [+1]Toggle ReplyLink» mdc replied on Fri Mar 7, 2003 @ 12:19pm
mdc
Coolness: 149040
but you forgot to jserk off in the shower too
Funny But True
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