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Title:State of Numb
Posted On:2006-05-27 00:00:00
Posted By:» earthyspirit
in spirit i am so alone disconnected
i used to be alive and growing moreso
every moment with you helped me abandon
the fears which held the spirit child inside
unleashed at last none recognized me
brash, excited, loud, fearless, undauntable
a child again, but a child alone with no friends
abandoned, attacked, turned away, shunned
where am I now? here again, nowhere now
would that this lifetime were another
our spirits merging on another plane
none of this time constrained physicality
age isnt matters, matters are matters
we've both made choices we regret
and got so close we felt comfortable
in stepping over the supposed lines
were we cherishing each other?

lovebond between us is beyond decision
marriage is concept and so is relationship
i don't know what to do about it anymore
you are so strong and wise and i fear you
ever since the night we first met i knew
ever present fears kept me from being me
until that morning when i awakened
but fear you I still did and do, why?
because I am failing all the time
and you can see it, you do see it
its been there for a long time
and i fear failing you
of everyone you

i feel lost now, ever since
i'm drifting with no anchor
you are like a gull calling to me
trying to tell me there is land nearby
but i cannot keep up, you fly too fast
dissapearing into the sky without me

body feels so many emotions
every time memories of us surface
living in a dream waking state of numb
don't know what to do, only want you
sad, this is so sad, bad dream go away

become a sunset and envelop me
blanket me with warm caress
hold on tight, dreams
are real
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